KITA SANGGUP ...berbaris berjam-jam untuk menghadiri ujibakat menyanyi.
PADAHAL KITA TAHU ...suara kita memang tak sedaP!!
Wednesday, October 31, 2007
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
IRI HATI
What is the meaning of IRI Hati?
What is wrong with people with IRI HATI?
Why?
Is it because the other person is better than you?
Or are you better than that person?
But why?
Alhamdulillah i besyukur walaupun i come from a broken up family, tapi my mom and late babah always thought me to bersyukur with what i have. Even the last week of his life di dunia ani, i sat with him at the corridor outside his wad, di RIPAS atu, he advice me dengan lembut how to live my life. How i should be very careful in everything i do, and to remember not to hurt anyone with words, perbuatan and a lot more. I thanked God of what i have become.
Lately this week, i miss my babah so much. I cried almost every night. I don't know why. I really cried... Tadi pagi i talked to my brother about him. I cried but i tahan my tears not to come out from my eyes. But my heart just so sedih. This time i really want my Babah's love, attention, but sayang he's not around. I don't know how.
Even now, writing this blog menitik-nitik air mata. I wish he's around. I miss him so much. Rindu ku kasih sayang nya. I wish i can go back now and see him and tell him how i felt. Rindu ku arah Babah. So i was talking with my brother about the day he went away, i was at home, with his body yand sudah bemandikan, there dengan bacaan Al-Fatihah for him, just starring at mayatnya Babah, berbungkus dengan kain putih, i can still tercium bau kapor barus fresh.... God... miss him so much...
My brother was at kubur that time, he was there menciumkan tanah for the last time. The story of my life with my family was so banyak story, but i was glad, well, we were all glad, that even both my parents were divorced when i was very-very young, the last few weeks we all were together with Babah. Mom, brothers and myself until Babah di kebumikan.
I miss him so much. I do miss Babah so much. Pain my dada actually now, i could not express how much i miss him. I know he's gone, but i wish he's around.
Girlfriend
Spoke to my girlfren this morning. Again, we ladies talk about macam macam kan. Ada body parts, ada social part and relationship part, and everything going apart...he.e.e. Cali eh. Mula-mula talk about body parts. Do you want to know?
Body-parts - contents nya like perut landir, perut buncit, ada stretch mark lah, kaki berurat, kulit tangan kasar, arm pandai melambai... ha.aa... ada ada saja.... paha inda macam dulu, banyak lagi lah. Ada yang belum kawin memang solid. Tapi ada jua inda eh. So we talk lah about body parts ani. More on arms. So i give a little tips jua lah on how to tone up your arms as long as rajin. Atu saja. Like you can do it everyday, anytime tapi properly. Light and easy, just everyday routine. Whatever it is, makan jaga, health jaga, and happiness pun jaga.
So settle the body-parts. Then, about relationship parts tia. And mula talk about hubbynya. It's like the song "ketahuan by Matta", caught right handed. Bukan sekali tapi banyak kali. She ask me how would i handle it if i were in her shoe. I dont know how but i just tell her if it were me, mun berkali-kali kenapatan atu, malas tah ku kan melarang. We are talking about perangai seseorang atu bah, we can't change it. No matter what you do. Tapi kecian kan, she cuba control him. Pakai b.mobile kan sekarang ani got live cam. So she check on him everytime, and sort of call him everytime just to check where he is. But still, she feel like he still have affair.
So, eh banyak jua so nya ani... The more you control, the more challangeing it will be for him, and the more he will screw you up. It's fun when you are in this situation. Now, let me tell you this, this guy ani got another phone. A different phone. He leaves it at work, and use it only when he's at work or probably hide it somewhere in the car. Check it out girls. Tapi not only men doing this, the woman pun ada. But then again, atu their problem.
But i know, for me, when at the end you know he is like that, that person that you wish would be the opposite, just have to let it be. They will not stop. They will only stop if they want to. Let it be. We are only human, and we just do whatever, however we can to the limit, that if you want to save the marriage. Apart from that, berdoa lah selalu, kerana doa akan di makbulkan kepada sesorang yang selalu berdoa meminta pertolongan agar dapat diuruskan segala yang diri sendiri tidak dapat menguruskan dengan cobaan dan dugaan yang di berikan. Insyallah kebenaran akan nampak dan hanya Allah saja yang dapat menolong diri ini dalam keaadan apa jua.
Kalau inda, mental tani olehnya. Why do we want to be mental pulang to think about it. You have to be strong jua kan. Its not that you inda laku jua. Its just my girlfriend ani masih ada respect arah husbandnya and she thinks of the children. Then, bila sudah tau perangai nya like that, have to tahan tah saja.
But i tell you, bini-bini pun ada had nya. Their love will be forever for you, i for instance, will love and forgive, but i will not forget. So i don't know how many woman yang catu? But different lah how people see it. Like me, After my divorce with my husband, it take a while jua to accept that you are actually divorced with the one you love and think would be together for life till death do you part. When you plan to get married, nobody even think of divorce. We all think fo a great future, to be together, for good for worst. But the reality, you have to accept it. To me nowm my 'x' husband and his wife now are one of my closest friend. That i can say. (Hi Sinar!! glad to hear you are back:)
Some friends ask me how did i do it? Well, its just forgiviness that change the whole thing. I accepted it, knowing that i want my son to grow up and respect people, whoever they may be, and to do that, i have to show examples and especially yang paling terdekat, his father and his stepmother. Walau apa pun, he is still the father kan, and the stepmother is going to be the a second mother for him.
And from that, once we the adult berfikiran wisely, then insyallah our children would do the same thing. Kalau kitani menjahati someone and kanak-kanak meliat all that, well, its going to hurt them and they will say one day, indung kami inda jua peduli. Kancang kancang lagi my family. Is that what you want kan? So it's actually up to you, you decide yourself on how you want your life, your kids to be. Atu saja ah....... melarat tia pulang...
Anyway, got to go now and have lunch. Tonite i will be on-air at 8pm to 12 am. Of course segmen cinta again, i got a good and cute topic...he.e.. tune in if not doing anything, or doing something ya. SMILE...
Body-parts - contents nya like perut landir, perut buncit, ada stretch mark lah, kaki berurat, kulit tangan kasar, arm pandai melambai... ha.aa... ada ada saja.... paha inda macam dulu, banyak lagi lah. Ada yang belum kawin memang solid. Tapi ada jua inda eh. So we talk lah about body parts ani. More on arms. So i give a little tips jua lah on how to tone up your arms as long as rajin. Atu saja. Like you can do it everyday, anytime tapi properly. Light and easy, just everyday routine. Whatever it is, makan jaga, health jaga, and happiness pun jaga.
So settle the body-parts. Then, about relationship parts tia. And mula talk about hubbynya. It's like the song "ketahuan by Matta", caught right handed. Bukan sekali tapi banyak kali. She ask me how would i handle it if i were in her shoe. I dont know how but i just tell her if it were me, mun berkali-kali kenapatan atu, malas tah ku kan melarang. We are talking about perangai seseorang atu bah, we can't change it. No matter what you do. Tapi kecian kan, she cuba control him. Pakai b.mobile kan sekarang ani got live cam. So she check on him everytime, and sort of call him everytime just to check where he is. But still, she feel like he still have affair.
So, eh banyak jua so nya ani... The more you control, the more challangeing it will be for him, and the more he will screw you up. It's fun when you are in this situation. Now, let me tell you this, this guy ani got another phone. A different phone. He leaves it at work, and use it only when he's at work or probably hide it somewhere in the car. Check it out girls. Tapi not only men doing this, the woman pun ada. But then again, atu their problem.
But i know, for me, when at the end you know he is like that, that person that you wish would be the opposite, just have to let it be. They will not stop. They will only stop if they want to. Let it be. We are only human, and we just do whatever, however we can to the limit, that if you want to save the marriage. Apart from that, berdoa lah selalu, kerana doa akan di makbulkan kepada sesorang yang selalu berdoa meminta pertolongan agar dapat diuruskan segala yang diri sendiri tidak dapat menguruskan dengan cobaan dan dugaan yang di berikan. Insyallah kebenaran akan nampak dan hanya Allah saja yang dapat menolong diri ini dalam keaadan apa jua.
Kalau inda, mental tani olehnya. Why do we want to be mental pulang to think about it. You have to be strong jua kan. Its not that you inda laku jua. Its just my girlfriend ani masih ada respect arah husbandnya and she thinks of the children. Then, bila sudah tau perangai nya like that, have to tahan tah saja.
But i tell you, bini-bini pun ada had nya. Their love will be forever for you, i for instance, will love and forgive, but i will not forget. So i don't know how many woman yang catu? But different lah how people see it. Like me, After my divorce with my husband, it take a while jua to accept that you are actually divorced with the one you love and think would be together for life till death do you part. When you plan to get married, nobody even think of divorce. We all think fo a great future, to be together, for good for worst. But the reality, you have to accept it. To me nowm my 'x' husband and his wife now are one of my closest friend. That i can say. (Hi Sinar!! glad to hear you are back:)
Some friends ask me how did i do it? Well, its just forgiviness that change the whole thing. I accepted it, knowing that i want my son to grow up and respect people, whoever they may be, and to do that, i have to show examples and especially yang paling terdekat, his father and his stepmother. Walau apa pun, he is still the father kan, and the stepmother is going to be the a second mother for him.
And from that, once we the adult berfikiran wisely, then insyallah our children would do the same thing. Kalau kitani menjahati someone and kanak-kanak meliat all that, well, its going to hurt them and they will say one day, indung kami inda jua peduli. Kancang kancang lagi my family. Is that what you want kan? So it's actually up to you, you decide yourself on how you want your life, your kids to be. Atu saja ah....... melarat tia pulang...
Anyway, got to go now and have lunch. Tonite i will be on-air at 8pm to 12 am. Of course segmen cinta again, i got a good and cute topic...he.e.. tune in if not doing anything, or doing something ya. SMILE...
Check it out, i got it from MSN Movies - Just love horror movies. Only movies saja.
Top 10 Scariest Movies We count down the films that still scare us silly
By Dave McCoyMSN Movies
When Norman Bates, dressed as his mother, ripped open Janet Leigh's shower curtain and knifed her to death in "Psycho," horror movies changed. Along with Leigh's blood, classic horror style and romantic figures like Frankenstein and Dracula went right down the shower drain. The veiled sexuality and hidden violence that dominated most classic horror films suddenly were gleefully dragged into the open, for everyone to exploit. For better or worse, style often became as important as substance, and booming box-office numbers proved that horror was serious business. The shifting times created opportunities for filmmakers to innovate, finding new and terrifying ways to scare the pants off audiences.
The mark of a great horror film is whether it sustains its vision of terror through several generations of increasingly desensitized viewers. Does the movie still make you jump or squirm or sweat or scream? The following efforts do all of the above.
10. "Eraserhead" (1977)David Lynch's cult classic is the closest thing to being stuck in a nightmare: Not much makes sense, but you get the feeling that nothing is quite right. Lynch employs dinners that walk off the plate, eerie silences that become deafening and an infant that makes Rosemary's baby seem cute and cuddly. So chilling it's damn near unwatchable.
9. "The Exorcist" (1973)The real terror of "The Exorcist" may not involve Satan and possession, but the helplessness of a parent trying to save a child. Of course, a ton of harrowing special effects and director William Friedkin's somber respect for the supernatural subject matter doesn't hurt either. It's horror for grown-ups.
8. "Halloween" (1978)John Carpenter's film is blamed for the rash of slasher films that destroyed the genre in the '80s, but "Halloween" possesses a style and intensity that most of its copycats lack. From the opening sequence -- when we see through the eyes of little boy Michael Myers as he stalks and murders his sister -- onward, the film relies on suspense rather than sensationalism. Our fear is caused by what might happen rather than actual events, as Carpenter spends a good amount of time in darkness, making us see things that may or may not be there.
7. "Don't Look Now" (1973)Donald Sutherland and Julie Christie head to Venice to forget the tragic accidental death of their child. However, it's impossible to forget when the dead child keeps reappearing. Nicolas Roeg's labyrinthine film is rich in dreamlike atmosphere and works on a purely psychological level: It disorients, frustrates and builds to a horrible climax, reminding that tragedy can never be forgotten ... and neither can this film.
6. "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre" (1974)A group of annoying teens make a wrong turn on a road trip through Texas and encounter the most dysfunctional family imaginable. It's a teen exploitation flick shot like a documentary. Wonderfully grim, mean and inhumane, director Tobe Hooper's debut doesn't spill much blood, instead opting to giddily, relentlessly torture and chase its audience (much like Leatherface treats his victims) for 80 minutes. It feels like days.
5. "Nightmare on Elm Street" (1984) Before dream-killer Freddy Krueger became a quipping pop-culture reference, he represented the most twisted monster unleashed on the public since Halloween's Michael Myers. Seeking vengeance by slicing and dicing the children of the parents who murdered him, Freddy scared the hell out of Cineplex audiences. His on-screen entrance remains terrifying, as does much of director Wes Craven's surreal, smart and shocking masterpiece.
4. "Suspiria" (1977)"Suspiria" is a full-on sensory assault by Italian horror master Dario Argento, the cinematic equivalent of an anxiety attack. A poor American ballet student arrives in Europe and Argento berates her with weather, grisly murders, a possible coven of witches, his virtuosic camera, and possible the freakiest score ever conceived (by the director himself). The plot barely makes sense, so just let it terrorize you.
3. "Night of the Living Dead" (1968)A group of kids get trapped inside a farm house by an endless stream of flesh-eating zombies. Sounds silly, but director George Romero takes his simple premise and redefines the genre with a shoestring budget. The amount of sadistic gore, the claustrophobic tension, the rising levels of hysteria and an increasingly deflated awareness that a happy ending is impossible make this a nasty classic. There is no hope here, only suffocating terror.
2. Repulsion (1965) Director Roman Polanski did more horror afterward, with "Rosemary's Baby" and "The Tenant," but this -- a menacing, nightmarish profile of one woman's descent into madness -- may be his most realized effort. Catherine Denueve embodies sexual repression as a young woman left alone in her apartment -- and to her deluded fantasies -- for the weekend. The film is nearly silent, creating a mounting mood of dread. Try watching it alone with the lights off and see how long you last.
1. "Psycho" (1960)Alfred Hitchcock's blueprint for contemporary horror: More than just a film, "Psycho" was a cultural slap in the face. Censors wanted to ban it, while screaming audiences couldn't get enough of it. Hitch employs all of his tricks -- shifting audience sympathies, killing off the main character halfway through the film and a ton of macabre humor -- but more importantly he makes the horror internal. Norman Bates isn't a monster in the classic sense; he suggests that the greatest evil can lurk beneath the quietest, most pleasant surface.
By Dave McCoyMSN Movies
When Norman Bates, dressed as his mother, ripped open Janet Leigh's shower curtain and knifed her to death in "Psycho," horror movies changed. Along with Leigh's blood, classic horror style and romantic figures like Frankenstein and Dracula went right down the shower drain. The veiled sexuality and hidden violence that dominated most classic horror films suddenly were gleefully dragged into the open, for everyone to exploit. For better or worse, style often became as important as substance, and booming box-office numbers proved that horror was serious business. The shifting times created opportunities for filmmakers to innovate, finding new and terrifying ways to scare the pants off audiences.
The mark of a great horror film is whether it sustains its vision of terror through several generations of increasingly desensitized viewers. Does the movie still make you jump or squirm or sweat or scream? The following efforts do all of the above.
10. "Eraserhead" (1977)David Lynch's cult classic is the closest thing to being stuck in a nightmare: Not much makes sense, but you get the feeling that nothing is quite right. Lynch employs dinners that walk off the plate, eerie silences that become deafening and an infant that makes Rosemary's baby seem cute and cuddly. So chilling it's damn near unwatchable.
9. "The Exorcist" (1973)The real terror of "The Exorcist" may not involve Satan and possession, but the helplessness of a parent trying to save a child. Of course, a ton of harrowing special effects and director William Friedkin's somber respect for the supernatural subject matter doesn't hurt either. It's horror for grown-ups.
8. "Halloween" (1978)John Carpenter's film is blamed for the rash of slasher films that destroyed the genre in the '80s, but "Halloween" possesses a style and intensity that most of its copycats lack. From the opening sequence -- when we see through the eyes of little boy Michael Myers as he stalks and murders his sister -- onward, the film relies on suspense rather than sensationalism. Our fear is caused by what might happen rather than actual events, as Carpenter spends a good amount of time in darkness, making us see things that may or may not be there.
7. "Don't Look Now" (1973)Donald Sutherland and Julie Christie head to Venice to forget the tragic accidental death of their child. However, it's impossible to forget when the dead child keeps reappearing. Nicolas Roeg's labyrinthine film is rich in dreamlike atmosphere and works on a purely psychological level: It disorients, frustrates and builds to a horrible climax, reminding that tragedy can never be forgotten ... and neither can this film.
6. "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre" (1974)A group of annoying teens make a wrong turn on a road trip through Texas and encounter the most dysfunctional family imaginable. It's a teen exploitation flick shot like a documentary. Wonderfully grim, mean and inhumane, director Tobe Hooper's debut doesn't spill much blood, instead opting to giddily, relentlessly torture and chase its audience (much like Leatherface treats his victims) for 80 minutes. It feels like days.
5. "Nightmare on Elm Street" (1984) Before dream-killer Freddy Krueger became a quipping pop-culture reference, he represented the most twisted monster unleashed on the public since Halloween's Michael Myers. Seeking vengeance by slicing and dicing the children of the parents who murdered him, Freddy scared the hell out of Cineplex audiences. His on-screen entrance remains terrifying, as does much of director Wes Craven's surreal, smart and shocking masterpiece.
4. "Suspiria" (1977)"Suspiria" is a full-on sensory assault by Italian horror master Dario Argento, the cinematic equivalent of an anxiety attack. A poor American ballet student arrives in Europe and Argento berates her with weather, grisly murders, a possible coven of witches, his virtuosic camera, and possible the freakiest score ever conceived (by the director himself). The plot barely makes sense, so just let it terrorize you.
3. "Night of the Living Dead" (1968)A group of kids get trapped inside a farm house by an endless stream of flesh-eating zombies. Sounds silly, but director George Romero takes his simple premise and redefines the genre with a shoestring budget. The amount of sadistic gore, the claustrophobic tension, the rising levels of hysteria and an increasingly deflated awareness that a happy ending is impossible make this a nasty classic. There is no hope here, only suffocating terror.
2. Repulsion (1965) Director Roman Polanski did more horror afterward, with "Rosemary's Baby" and "The Tenant," but this -- a menacing, nightmarish profile of one woman's descent into madness -- may be his most realized effort. Catherine Denueve embodies sexual repression as a young woman left alone in her apartment -- and to her deluded fantasies -- for the weekend. The film is nearly silent, creating a mounting mood of dread. Try watching it alone with the lights off and see how long you last.
1. "Psycho" (1960)Alfred Hitchcock's blueprint for contemporary horror: More than just a film, "Psycho" was a cultural slap in the face. Censors wanted to ban it, while screaming audiences couldn't get enough of it. Hitch employs all of his tricks -- shifting audience sympathies, killing off the main character halfway through the film and a ton of macabre humor -- but more importantly he makes the horror internal. Norman Bates isn't a monster in the classic sense; he suggests that the greatest evil can lurk beneath the quietest, most pleasant surface.
CONTROL WHAT YOU CAN - ONE AT A TIME
Trying to control uncontrollable factors is a key cause of stress and unhappiness. You can't be all the things to all people, but you can take time for the most important commitments and take time to figure out what these are. Doesn't matter where you at, work or home, just think what of all that the most important one to focus on.. Instead of comparing stress loads with others, modify it by focusing on problem solving.
Monday, October 29, 2007
Counting
I just couldn't wait to get better. I want to do my workout already. Well... counting on the days.. Been at home and watched E! entertainment channel 711. Very interesting... How rich become rich.. How poor become rich.. How you actually have the chance in your life to be what you want to be.
If you wanted to be EXTRAORDINARY, then you will. But if you choose to be the way it is, then it be. Its up to you. Are you willing to go for it? Ask yourself now. Not necessary now, but soon enough that it wouldn't be too late and regret it. Time passes by so fast like a blink of your eyes. Ask again, ARE YOU WILLING TO GO FOR IT AND HOW FAR??
By the way, i would like to wish KATHERINE at Woodlands, California on your birthday today. Happy Birthday sweet girl. How's the Gilmore Girls getting on? ......
I am going to bed now. PS. Don't let the bugs bite..
**When i looked up the sky, i smiled because i got to see my stars. I named the stars after me when i was at the beach at Malibu. So when the sky is clear at night, stars are out, and it reminds me of those times. Cool winds and beautiful beach. Just unimaginably beautiful.**
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO IRIL
If You Have A Dream
Live That Dream
And Someday
Your Dream Will
Come True
by. Adete Basheer
From. Zura Pelangi to my Good Friend Dj.Iril on his birthday today 29.10...
Home
Was home whole day yesterday. Not well to be out and about. I miss the roadshow at the mall, and i am sure all were having fun. I beurut yesterday. Been berangin since i got back from the states. But hopefully a few more urut will be better. Looking forward and need to go out and about to do some exercises. I miss going to tasek for my afternoon walk. Need to do that soon.
Just a tips, if you are not well, don't force yourself to exercise. Get well, the most important thing on the list, the health that is, then baru tah exercise but biar mild. Jangan terburu-buru, because your staminar not the same like your other friends. Remember ah.
Biasa lah, lapas berurut, inda kena suroh touch water. So inda tah mandi. Better to stay at home lah kalau inda mandi. I am not working today, so its just nice. Rupanya angin also can kill you. I heard this lady while doing her presentation, suddenly her jaw got jammed. Imagine tia, how painful was that? So because of angin jua tu.
I remember i got muscle spasm, i was in my restaurant early that morning, then suddenly i felt from my chest upwards jammed sort of paralysed. I pushed myself to the wall behind me, and i stood straight. I just couldn't move at all. I slowly sat myself down on the floor, and i just couldn't move. Luckily, at that time, i stayed on the 3rd floor of that building, and my workers have to carry me up. Yes, i couldn't explain the pain. My eyes just blinked and i was lost. I didn't know what just happened.
I told the manager to call the ambulance and my mother. She came with my late aunty, and they weren't sure what was going on. It was sure really scary when you just didn't have any idea of what went wrong. I guess at that time i was thinking too much, work and business. So stress and worn out. But anyway, i felt real good when the ambulance arrive.
They have to carry me down from the 3rd floor with the stretcher. They were really really good and professional. The one guy, i forgot his name, but Pengiran who work with the ambulance, he had done a good job and very professional. I was in real pain, and he told me that he got to angkat me from here to here. And i said ok and i was ready. WALAAA... he was good. He knew what he was doing.
Reached the hospital RIPAS and i found out that i have muscle spasm. Well, i was told to relax and got few japs. My son, he was next to me, hold my hand and i can see tears running down from his eyes. So sweet. I told him i will get better soon.
So, now i know not to be so stress out. Its hard to say sometime, but at least of what had happened atu, i just take it lightly kalau stress pun, but not all at once.
Just a tips, if you are not well, don't force yourself to exercise. Get well, the most important thing on the list, the health that is, then baru tah exercise but biar mild. Jangan terburu-buru, because your staminar not the same like your other friends. Remember ah.
Biasa lah, lapas berurut, inda kena suroh touch water. So inda tah mandi. Better to stay at home lah kalau inda mandi. I am not working today, so its just nice. Rupanya angin also can kill you. I heard this lady while doing her presentation, suddenly her jaw got jammed. Imagine tia, how painful was that? So because of angin jua tu.
I remember i got muscle spasm, i was in my restaurant early that morning, then suddenly i felt from my chest upwards jammed sort of paralysed. I pushed myself to the wall behind me, and i stood straight. I just couldn't move at all. I slowly sat myself down on the floor, and i just couldn't move. Luckily, at that time, i stayed on the 3rd floor of that building, and my workers have to carry me up. Yes, i couldn't explain the pain. My eyes just blinked and i was lost. I didn't know what just happened.
I told the manager to call the ambulance and my mother. She came with my late aunty, and they weren't sure what was going on. It was sure really scary when you just didn't have any idea of what went wrong. I guess at that time i was thinking too much, work and business. So stress and worn out. But anyway, i felt real good when the ambulance arrive.
They have to carry me down from the 3rd floor with the stretcher. They were really really good and professional. The one guy, i forgot his name, but Pengiran who work with the ambulance, he had done a good job and very professional. I was in real pain, and he told me that he got to angkat me from here to here. And i said ok and i was ready. WALAAA... he was good. He knew what he was doing.
Reached the hospital RIPAS and i found out that i have muscle spasm. Well, i was told to relax and got few japs. My son, he was next to me, hold my hand and i can see tears running down from his eyes. So sweet. I told him i will get better soon.
So, now i know not to be so stress out. Its hard to say sometime, but at least of what had happened atu, i just take it lightly kalau stress pun, but not all at once.
Sunday, October 28, 2007
CLOSE - MILES APART
CLOSE - this is when you tell him that you love him and he says he loves you too.
MILES APART - you tell hime you love him and he says "Me too".
MILES APART - you tell hime you love him and he says "Me too".
Updates
the story.
1....the fren of a fren who committed suicide - What really went wrong for that kind of decision?
2....Just a fren of a fren, a girlfriend is in process of a divorce with her long time husband because the husband ada affair with her sister at home while she's at work, yes the younger one. And plan to divorce her and marry her sister. That means his sister in-law he is about to marry and ditch the wife. How cruel is that? Jodoh? What went wrong?
1....the fren of a fren who committed suicide - What really went wrong for that kind of decision?
2....Just a fren of a fren, a girlfriend is in process of a divorce with her long time husband because the husband ada affair with her sister at home while she's at work, yes the younger one. And plan to divorce her and marry her sister. That means his sister in-law he is about to marry and ditch the wife. How cruel is that? Jodoh? What went wrong?
Saturday, October 27, 2007
Dialysis Treatment
A friend 0f mine have her Dialysis Treatment 3x every week. That's how she live now. She was 23 when the doctor told her of her kidney problem. She was working at Pusat Kesenian Berakas that time, bahagian tanunan. Now 19 years she's been on that treatment. Alhamdulillah, she jaga her makan.
Thank you to His Majesty The Sultan of Brunei, provides medical care for Bruneians for free and especially for kidney patients for the free Dialysis Treatment. We actually have a lot of kidney patients here in Brunei too. If di luar negeri, you have to pay each treatment you do, and that is where the medical insurance is a must to have. The treatment is so expensive, that your insurance pay for your medical tu. In Brunei nada catu tu. Aren't we lucky.
I remember when i was in the States for holiday kan hari atu, i wanted to rent a car, and they ask me my driving license, id and insurance. So, tell me about that. So anyway, Bruneians should be thankful jua with the health service we have here. If you've been abroad, you will know, and you will appreciate with what we here here in Brunei.
What's the sign she have? My friend punya story, she felt damam-damam, bangkak-bangkak and nada selera makan pada awal atu. Lamah badan nya, every time. She was basically a very active person. She could not imagine she anak bungsu daripada ramai siblings would be having problem with her kidney. But so far, she's very determined to live life the fullest, and she is very strong. She went through a lot.
She was in a COMA for a couple of times. There were times she was in the ICU and families and relatives baca Yasin already for her. But one time i visit her when she was in a coma, her body bloat, and i hold her hand, i felt like she was trying to talk to me. When she woke up from that "deep sleep", she said she don't want to die yet.
Anyway, this is the pictures i took today when i visited her at Rimba. This is yang arah tangan nya. But she did once a upon a time kena put the small tube to her heart for 3months. She said that it was really painful.
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After removing the needles, must press for 3 to 5 minutes
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Ps. The male nurse who did the process of removing the "everything", have been doing this for 17 years. Imagine how he did it. He is really really good.
Thank you to His Majesty The Sultan of Brunei, provides medical care for Bruneians for free and especially for kidney patients for the free Dialysis Treatment. We actually have a lot of kidney patients here in Brunei too. If di luar negeri, you have to pay each treatment you do, and that is where the medical insurance is a must to have. The treatment is so expensive, that your insurance pay for your medical tu. In Brunei nada catu tu. Aren't we lucky.
I remember when i was in the States for holiday kan hari atu, i wanted to rent a car, and they ask me my driving license, id and insurance. So, tell me about that. So anyway, Bruneians should be thankful jua with the health service we have here. If you've been abroad, you will know, and you will appreciate with what we here here in Brunei.
What's the sign she have? My friend punya story, she felt damam-damam, bangkak-bangkak and nada selera makan pada awal atu. Lamah badan nya, every time. She was basically a very active person. She could not imagine she anak bungsu daripada ramai siblings would be having problem with her kidney. But so far, she's very determined to live life the fullest, and she is very strong. She went through a lot.
She was in a COMA for a couple of times. There were times she was in the ICU and families and relatives baca Yasin already for her. But one time i visit her when she was in a coma, her body bloat, and i hold her hand, i felt like she was trying to talk to me. When she woke up from that "deep sleep", she said she don't want to die yet.
Anyway, this is the pictures i took today when i visited her at Rimba. This is yang arah tangan nya. But she did once a upon a time kena put the small tube to her heart for 3months. She said that it was really painful.
After treatment
the process of removing the needle after treatment
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After removing the needles, must press for 3 to 5 minutes
well, this are the needles
this is "Kidney" & goes in different sizes
Ps. The male nurse who did the process of removing the "everything", have been doing this for 17 years. Imagine how he did it. He is really really good.
Last Night
I wrote this last night before i go to sleep.
"Life is just like a box of Chocolate"
I'm sure you've heard it, right?
Sometimes you're lucky and sometimes not
One day you ate the bitter dark chocolate
Another day you ate a dark but sweet chocolate
Again you ate your favourite chocolate flavour without knowing it
Then it makes you smile but just for a while
Then you just keep on and on eating a different one each day
So it get interesting every time you ate it
And at times it makes you wonder, really wonder
Who created chocolates?
Where is it actually from?
How do they know what combination flavor?
Would people like chocolate?
What make them buy the chocolates?
Oh well....
I still have a lot left in that box of chocolate
Just don't know what type and flavor i will eat tomorrow..?
That's how life goes..
I have been eating all different kind of chocolates too
It is so unpredictable, mysterious, some are unimaginably tasteless
Just hoping tomorrow I will get to eat the sweet one
That melt in the mouth and smile with satisfaction
And enjoyed it with pleasures.
"Life is just like a box of Chocolate"
I'm sure you've heard it, right?
Sometimes you're lucky and sometimes not
One day you ate the bitter dark chocolate
Another day you ate a dark but sweet chocolate
Again you ate your favourite chocolate flavour without knowing it
Then it makes you smile but just for a while
Then you just keep on and on eating a different one each day
So it get interesting every time you ate it
And at times it makes you wonder, really wonder
Who created chocolates?
Where is it actually from?
How do they know what combination flavor?
Would people like chocolate?
What make them buy the chocolates?
Oh well....
I still have a lot left in that box of chocolate
Just don't know what type and flavor i will eat tomorrow..?
That's how life goes..
I have been eating all different kind of chocolates too
It is so unpredictable, mysterious, some are unimaginably tasteless
Just hoping tomorrow I will get to eat the sweet one
That melt in the mouth and smile with satisfaction
And enjoyed it with pleasures.
Thursday, October 25, 2007
Be It
You know it and i know it.
I am the type of person who will give you a chance.
I will let no lies for you to plan.
So be it.
Be happy when you are done.
Be happy when you are satisfy with it.
Be happy when your plan went well.
I will not stop you.
For whatever reason you want to deal it with.
I have ear and i will hear.
But again, i will let no lies for you to plan.
I want you to know that.
I am the type of person who will give you a chance.
I will let no lies for you to plan.
So be it.
Be happy when you are done.
Be happy when you are satisfy with it.
Be happy when your plan went well.
I will not stop you.
For whatever reason you want to deal it with.
I have ear and i will hear.
But again, i will let no lies for you to plan.
I want you to know that.
By.Zura aka anisa zahrah07
Yesterday... and the suicide
Yesterday... all the trouble seems so far away, now.. Wah.. i nyanyi-nyanyi lagi while writing ani. Yes, when i was younger, all i see was so happy ending story for my life. Want to know why i think that way? Well, my father used to take us watched a cartoon classic at bandar rah Bolkiah pangong wayang. I remember, every time tu, kalau ada saja that sort of movie on, then my dad sure bawa punya. So i see life like that. A happy ending one.
Tapi as i grew up, not really like that ah. Very different one. Oh and also, every time i pass at the Alat-Alat Kebesaran DiRaja, always reminded me when there was once the Churchill. The Aquarium with lots of fish, lobster, seahorse and some other ocean species. That was where i first see all. And i do appreciate those kind of things. My father used to fish a lot, and he bought back the king crab. And many more. I guess we all have a different things when we grew up kan. My father was so into nature. So i appreciate the beauty of nature that we have in Brunei and wherever i go and teliat.
So yesterday punya story lain lah. I read a lot and did a lot of research for work. Just to be prepared. I'm off a couple of days. And soon be on-air. I heard a fren told me that a fren passed away taking his own life. Bless his soul. It's sad when we take matters in our own had. Especially our life. The beginning of life starts there, not here. And it's just sad to hear that from a fren.
This reminds me when i was younger, i was in my late teens. I got a fren who was 16 at that time. And she was depressed about her life. About her boyfriend and his family. She got pregnant and the boyfriend didn't marry her. Instead he marry the other girlfriend of his first, and then only he marry her when she was close due. I look after her during her pregnancy, i told her i will take care of her baby. I even give name for her baby girl. She's probably in her teens now. I wish i know where she is now and to have a chance to see her one more time.
So anyhew.. it was too much for her. Her husband was on drugs, and just too much... way too much.... She gave me her baby, and i only have her for a while. Then her husband took that baby away from me and ran off. Ever since, i never see her anymore. Its a girl. I would love to tell you her name here, but for safety reason i rather not. So anyway, my girlfriend ani commit suicide. She drank racun rumput. it took her less than 24 hours to take her life and just gone!!! She told us that she was scared, she saw a black creature in her dream taking her away. She was at RIPAS hospital. The next morning, she was gone. She cried that she really regret doing it, and that she was really scared that something evil that she herself could not explain is waiting for her. Can you imagine?
As i go through life, this was a lesson for me too. Always, remember the love ones you have, who love you, and Allah loves you and given you a test that Allah knows that you will for sure go through it with his blessing. And to remaja out there, no matter how cool, how bad you think you are, just remember that Allah loves you more that anyone in this world and that no matter what you do, please jangan tinggal kan Solat.
That the story in Brunei. A fren commit a suicide. But when i was studying abroad in USA in one of the High School, i saw with my own eyes a guy was shot in the cafeteria of our school. How sad was that? Too many and too much to tell you if i want to. But well, everyone have a different stories and experience that no one can buy. And through that, its all about life kan.
Oh.. still reading The Historian, the part i read is getting interesting. Spooky and chilling.. nanti lagi ceta tu. Oh i paid my car yesterday, and my boss call me from the office re. something (ha.a.. i let you be curious on that one ah..) then home.
Tomorrow i am off to Miri to see my dentist. Yeah, dental appointment so far away. Its going to be fun. Good nyte.
Tapi as i grew up, not really like that ah. Very different one. Oh and also, every time i pass at the Alat-Alat Kebesaran DiRaja, always reminded me when there was once the Churchill. The Aquarium with lots of fish, lobster, seahorse and some other ocean species. That was where i first see all. And i do appreciate those kind of things. My father used to fish a lot, and he bought back the king crab. And many more. I guess we all have a different things when we grew up kan. My father was so into nature. So i appreciate the beauty of nature that we have in Brunei and wherever i go and teliat.
So yesterday punya story lain lah. I read a lot and did a lot of research for work. Just to be prepared. I'm off a couple of days. And soon be on-air. I heard a fren told me that a fren passed away taking his own life. Bless his soul. It's sad when we take matters in our own had. Especially our life. The beginning of life starts there, not here. And it's just sad to hear that from a fren.
This reminds me when i was younger, i was in my late teens. I got a fren who was 16 at that time. And she was depressed about her life. About her boyfriend and his family. She got pregnant and the boyfriend didn't marry her. Instead he marry the other girlfriend of his first, and then only he marry her when she was close due. I look after her during her pregnancy, i told her i will take care of her baby. I even give name for her baby girl. She's probably in her teens now. I wish i know where she is now and to have a chance to see her one more time.
So anyhew.. it was too much for her. Her husband was on drugs, and just too much... way too much.... She gave me her baby, and i only have her for a while. Then her husband took that baby away from me and ran off. Ever since, i never see her anymore. Its a girl. I would love to tell you her name here, but for safety reason i rather not. So anyway, my girlfriend ani commit suicide. She drank racun rumput. it took her less than 24 hours to take her life and just gone!!! She told us that she was scared, she saw a black creature in her dream taking her away. She was at RIPAS hospital. The next morning, she was gone. She cried that she really regret doing it, and that she was really scared that something evil that she herself could not explain is waiting for her. Can you imagine?
As i go through life, this was a lesson for me too. Always, remember the love ones you have, who love you, and Allah loves you and given you a test that Allah knows that you will for sure go through it with his blessing. And to remaja out there, no matter how cool, how bad you think you are, just remember that Allah loves you more that anyone in this world and that no matter what you do, please jangan tinggal kan Solat.
That the story in Brunei. A fren commit a suicide. But when i was studying abroad in USA in one of the High School, i saw with my own eyes a guy was shot in the cafeteria of our school. How sad was that? Too many and too much to tell you if i want to. But well, everyone have a different stories and experience that no one can buy. And through that, its all about life kan.
Oh.. still reading The Historian, the part i read is getting interesting. Spooky and chilling.. nanti lagi ceta tu. Oh i paid my car yesterday, and my boss call me from the office re. something (ha.a.. i let you be curious on that one ah..) then home.
Tomorrow i am off to Miri to see my dentist. Yeah, dental appointment so far away. Its going to be fun. Good nyte.
What i do today?
Apart from waking up early in the morning sending my son to school, i clean my kitchen today, and got to watched 3DVDs. And there are:-
Beyond The Sea (Kevin Spacey & Kate Bosworth)
Stardust - Mathew Vaughn Film (Claire Danes, Michelle Pfeiffer, Robert De Niro)
No Reservation - A Scott Hicks Film (Catherine Zeta-Jones, A'aron Eckhart)
All were great. About life. Beyond The Sea that he got to find out that who he thought was his mother was his grandmother. Very touching story about his life. About Bobby Darren, and how he become famous and then on and on and on... if you haven't seen it, go get the DVD and see it yourself.
Stardust is about love. Different kind and different way, but all just a lesson learn from all this but it also depends on you. How you see it. So very interesting too.... A bit childish, got witches, unicorn, a star and etc. I like em.
No Reservation is also about a woman and her career. Very interesting toh. I like it. The character the man have in that film, i wouldn't mind to have that kind of man. Romantic in a different way. It also depend on you. How you see it.
Just being at home today. Some friends ask me if i wanted to join them out and about, but nah... i prefer to stay home.
Beyond The Sea (Kevin Spacey & Kate Bosworth)
Stardust - Mathew Vaughn Film (Claire Danes, Michelle Pfeiffer, Robert De Niro)
No Reservation - A Scott Hicks Film (Catherine Zeta-Jones, A'aron Eckhart)
All were great. About life. Beyond The Sea that he got to find out that who he thought was his mother was his grandmother. Very touching story about his life. About Bobby Darren, and how he become famous and then on and on and on... if you haven't seen it, go get the DVD and see it yourself.
Stardust is about love. Different kind and different way, but all just a lesson learn from all this but it also depends on you. How you see it. So very interesting too.... A bit childish, got witches, unicorn, a star and etc. I like em.
No Reservation is also about a woman and her career. Very interesting toh. I like it. The character the man have in that film, i wouldn't mind to have that kind of man. Romantic in a different way. It also depend on you. How you see it.
Just being at home today. Some friends ask me if i wanted to join them out and about, but nah... i prefer to stay home.
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Tuesday, October 23, 2007
Revision
Oh not mine of course lah. C-baby ku, Luqman is having his exam soon on the 1st week of November ani and he has projects to finished. So today we finished up his project on transportation. I sat with him and cut pictures he needed. I told him to paste it and design it himself and i add a bit here and there for him. He wanted to finish it up tomorrow, then i told him to finish one today and then continue with another one tomorrow. So, i made him hot milo with cream on top and with two biscuit. He hug me and said "i love you mommy, thank you". I went to the kitchen and smile with joy. So sweet.
Earlier i watched the Prison Break Season Two. Very nice. Very interesting. One of the brother look like my brother. Yes, i even told him about it, and i asked him today in the morning when i met him, weather anyone ever told him that. Ha.a.a i am not alone, true...true... The character reminds me of him too. I will leave you with the curiosity for that.
Anyhew... i miss those words. Katherine used to say that, and wow.... her birthday is coming soon. She did say she wanted Jelly Belly in a Big Jar too for her birthday present. What remind me of her too, i went to "kedai kominis" and saw GILMORE GIRLS dvd. I remember i took her picture at the Santa Monica's Pier, there a place where they shoot one of the episode, she was so happy. So sweet. I wonder how she is now. I am sure she's looking forward for her birthday party.
My mission for this week is to sit with Luqman and do revisions with him. One two subjects he have a problem with but not that bad. His marks are very good. I am proud of him. Waking up in the early morning just to send him to school is part of my duty, and cook for him dinner. He is a simple boy, and a very loving one too.
Oh, i masak nasi ayam for lunch today. Great food eh... I named it "Nasi Ayam Anih". Yes.. true..
Earlier i watched the Prison Break Season Two. Very nice. Very interesting. One of the brother look like my brother. Yes, i even told him about it, and i asked him today in the morning when i met him, weather anyone ever told him that. Ha.a.a i am not alone, true...true... The character reminds me of him too. I will leave you with the curiosity for that.
Anyhew... i miss those words. Katherine used to say that, and wow.... her birthday is coming soon. She did say she wanted Jelly Belly in a Big Jar too for her birthday present. What remind me of her too, i went to "kedai kominis" and saw GILMORE GIRLS dvd. I remember i took her picture at the Santa Monica's Pier, there a place where they shoot one of the episode, she was so happy. So sweet. I wonder how she is now. I am sure she's looking forward for her birthday party.
My mission for this week is to sit with Luqman and do revisions with him. One two subjects he have a problem with but not that bad. His marks are very good. I am proud of him. Waking up in the early morning just to send him to school is part of my duty, and cook for him dinner. He is a simple boy, and a very loving one too.
Oh, i masak nasi ayam for lunch today. Great food eh... I named it "Nasi Ayam Anih". Yes.. true..
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